Sad day :(

My breast are hardly producing any milk. The docs say its because of stress. I'm sad that Jules will not be breastfeed for at least 6 months. I started giving her formula. I had no other choice because I would try to nurse but nothing would come out:(

SHRIVELED
1.Wrinkled because the volume has reduced while the surface area of the outer layer has remained constant.
A prune is a shriveled plum.
2.Collapsed in size.
His insults, from someone I respect so much, make me want to shrivel up and die.

DRIED
1.Without water or moisture.

FAILURE
1.State or condition of not meeting a desirable or intended objective, opposite of success.
2.An object, person or endeavour in a state of failure or incapable of success.
3.Termination of the ability of LYNDA to perform HER required function.

Palms Beach!

Palms Beach was fun. Jules enjoyed it. She loves the water. Breanna was able to play and her legs are looking alot better. She totaly forgot all about them. I can tell she can't run as fast or play as hard as she use too. I'm not sure if its because she is growing up or because her joints hurt. I thinks its a combination of both. Beto got to burn energy which is always good. My sister and her girls joined us. Well...Dre Dre and Meches did. Carissa was with her dad. I miss seeing her. Every time I see her it seems her boobs have gotten bigger and she has grown 1/2 and inch taller. Don't get me started on her booty. I'm not looking forward to that with Breanna. I want her to NEVER grow-up!!!! We also made our very own volcano dessert since we didn't have the energy to go to the Rainforest Cafe after lunch. Then we stayed up watching the Sci-Fi Channel till 2:00AM. Beto of couse fell asleep 1st.

Quick Update!

Quick update while I'm waiting for Diane to pick me up from work and pumping. I have come to hate pumping. I wish I was a home so I can nurse Julianna. But I'm still at work wishing I will win the lottery soon. Bre had her appointment today for her kidney biopsy results. She's on meds that are going to make her gain weight, moody and can possibility have lots of long term effects. That sucks. This is something we are going to have to deal with at the very least 9 months. That sucks. Only have 300 bucks in my medical flex spending account and the bills keep rolling in. That sucks. Haven't received a child support payment since October of last year. That sucks. This blog should of been titled "That Sucks". Well thats all I have for now. This blog post sucks!

Mermaid Sunday!

Picked up this little number from the Build A Bear Store!!!






Doesn't she look cute. I just had to get it. I'm surprised it fit. Well not much going on here just getting ready for work tomorrow. Wondering when playing the lotto will pay off. oooohhhh yea did feed Jules her first feeding of cereal today. She loved it! Probably because I mixed it with breast milk instead of water. This weekend all I did was nurse nurse nurse. NO PUMPING! Hoping this will increase my milk production. I really want to nurse at the very least six months. Then to formula. :( Sad but must happen if we want another baby in the house. Looking forward to our trip to Palms Springs @ Moody Gardens, of course. Bre can enjoy it because its not salt water. Will update with pics then.

Breanna Marie

Ooooohhhhh my baby girl! She is scheduled for a kidney biopsy tomorrow at noon. She is so nervous and scared. She is upset about not being able to eat anything until after her procedure. She is such an eater. I'm scared for her as well. She can be such a drama queen when she is scared. She is my surgery baby. When she was born she insisted on coming in to this world via c-section. She was breached. When I tried so hard to have a vaginal delivery. I even went so far into having a procedure where they turned her to the correct position and as soon as the doctor let go she flipped right around. That should of warned me on her stubbornness.

Then she has her appendix taken out. Now she has this weird HSP Purpura crap and needs to have a kidney biopsy. Oh my little baby girl. She is my little surgery baby. I have only had one surgery in my life and it was to bring her into this world. I found these pictures today while I was cleaning up. They are kinda Random. She was so little. I can't believe how time just gets away from you.